What age to tell your kids????

[JCOOPER]

My daughter is almost 8yrs old and in second grade.  My wife was convinced that all of her friends had ruined the whole easter bunny thing.  She had been asking alot of  "How is that possible" and "Is he really real" and a bunch of questions to the sort.  We have always been real open with her about everything, so we decide to tell her.  Now you cant only tell her about the easter bunny.  You pretty much have to put an axe to the tooth fairy and santa at the same time.  So we sit her down and break the news to her.  As she is sitting on the couch crying her eyes out, i look to my wife and say "good call on her knowing already!"   My question I guess is,  is there any kind of standard age to this situation?  I had an older brother.  He took care of telling me, even before I probably should have known.

[Langer]

Not sure when the best time to tell then is, but I do enjoy still getting stuff from the Easter Bunny and Santa. My wifes little brother is only 7 so at Christmas we still get Santa items and at Easter we still get Easter Baskets. I hope no one tells him for awhile 

[JCOOPER]

We explained to her that we have been the ones all along providing those items and that they werent going to quit.  We still have another little one so it will be some time before santa actually quits visiting our house.

[fiker]

When it comes to kids, there is no "age" for anything.  It's just when you sense they're ready. 
She'll get over the disappointment quick.  Especially if you include her in keeping it going for the younger sibling.
My kids are 22 and this will be the first year with no bunny. 
And that's only because none of them eat much candy. 

But dad does.   Wonder if I'll get a chocolate bunny?.....

[Dan]

I also agree with the let your conscience be your guide theory and not to establish a specific age. I do think that when you feel the time is right you can use this as a way to develop the kind of communication necessary in order to promote discussion on many important issues with your child. They need to know that you want to talk about important things with them and that you are always going to be straight with them. "Coming of age" is an important theme used by many good writers because there are those critical periods in life where new concepts and ideas need to be worked through. Puberty party time is a biggy that comes to mind. That happens at different times for different kids. Other biggies include how to deal effectively with bullies. If your child goes to school they need strategies that empower them. Give them suggestions as to how to deal with people that are doing things they don't like. Make sure you make them in a 123 type hierarchy with them initiating the action, but make sure they know that you are built in to this system after they have tried the intial strategies. Gives them a chance to handle it on their own and that builds confidence knowing that their grievances can be addressed and acted upon. Rambling here but the 34 years working with kids gets those juices flowing. Let me know if you're ready for how to work with your child on increasing focus and concentration. Skills they must have, but aren't taught in many classrooms. It's my opinion that the single biggest difference between elementary students is not ability, but the degree to which they can focus and sustain attention. There are some very concrete and simple things to be done and again it empowers the child.

[thedude]

just show her that pick of the black lab with the bunny ears in his mouth. that cracks me up every time i see it.

[gbaade]

I try to keep my kids young and innocent for as long as I can. Part of that is letting them believe in the Bunny and Santa. I'm sure there's alot of things kids hear and see at school that might make them think a certain way, but if it doesn't become an issue then why try to fix it?

My girls are 9 7 and 6 and I'll be darned if I will let them act like they are 18. We had a party for my 9 year old and some of her classmates that came were clearly watching MTV too much. Keep em young and enjoy every minute of it.

[bshaner]

My wife and I's plan is just to keep it going until they realize it on their own.  The 10 year old is already leaning toward there not being a Santa.  Just let them live it out.  I'd wager if you didnt bring it up until December she might forget about it in the whirlwind of Christmas and still get into Santa.  What child doesnt like presents and do they really care who they are from?

Play it by ear and see if she joins in the spirit.

B

[Revtro]

Funny and true story:  I had a friend who told his kids from the outset that there is no Santa.  When they were old enough to understand, he explained to them that Santa was once a real person who did nice things for people during Christmas, but that was in times past and he is not a real living person anymore.

What he did NOT tell his kids was not to ruin for the other kids.  So one Sunday at church his innocent little girl got into a conversation with other children who started talking about Santa.  The reason I know they had this conversation was because of the children running to their parents in horror with tears streaming down their faces yelling "she told us Santa Claus is dead!!"  Hysterically they cried, "Santa's dead, Santa's dead."  When they came running to me (the Pastor) to ask me if it was true, I simply said "you'll need to ask mom and dad about that one". 

So whatever you tell them, maybe try to encourage them to not ruin it for the other kids.  Just a thought. 

[JCOOPER]

We did explain to her that it is very important not to talk about it with her friends.  We are friends with parents of one of her good friend.  That girl doesnt yet know and it appears that my daughter is still keeping it in the DL.

[rudycard72]

My older brother made sure I knew none of them were real as long as i can remember. I have a one year old son now and me and my wife talked about this before. I don't see why we all create this fairytale world for our kids to live in so one day they learn it was all just a "story" and this world isn't so fairytale after all. My wife doesn't see it the same way i do so I'll probably just go along with it all until my brothers son tells him they aren't real.

[Mojo]

Noone got this one right. This is simple.                                                                                                                                                                 I told my 7 year (who heard rumors they all were fake) that the Easter Bunny is indeed a fable. I also told him that Daddy would be square with him and gave him the basics of the Easter Holiday. He needed to hear I was being truthful so that when I say "now Santa Claus is real and he does visit Good Little Boys", my boy knows I'm not fibbin.

SOooooooooooo, I basicly cut bait to stretch the Christmas fable as long as possible !!!!! We go all out. Feed the deer, (go outside at midnight and take half bites out of most of them) put my deer paws in the ground and sled tracks - cookie bites and even letters from Santa with burnt edges in a scroll left next to the milk.  My oldest boots track soot from the fireplace onto the hearth, sometimes a big black button is in the middle of the carpet. Each year something different.

I have alot of years wrapped up in gift giving and oh by the way, since I know you are all taking notes, make sure you unwrap and build all of SANTAS toys because they are not made at Meijers, they're from the North Pole !!!

In summary - you gotta ace the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and Boogie Man to preserve Santa.

Mojo Out !

[stackenem]

Now you went and ruined it for me I still Believe that is what keeps us young.

[motocross269]

They grow up fast..I have a 14 yr old and a 4 year old. Girls.  I look at my 4 year old and it just seems like yesterday that my 14 year old was that age.
Enjoy them why they are young..They don't stay that way for long.  
And spend time with them...I threw alot of good years away with my oldest because of military commitments.  You can never get those back.  The memory of that xbox or whatever will only last as long as the toy, but they will remember the time you took the day off to take them fishing or whatever.  
As far as the Easter Bunny and all of that...I say drag it out as long as you can.  I think it is as much fun for me as it is for the kids.

[Revtro]

In summary - you gotta ace the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and Boogie Man to preserve Santa.

Mojo Out !

You mean to tell me there's no Santa?  Crap.     Whose eating my cookies then?  Hmmm.